The Gorge

The Skinny

Miles Teller and Anya Taylor-Joy guard opposite sides of a huge hole in the ground. But "huge hole in the ground" doesn't have quite the ring to it as "THE GORGE!" does, right?

The Good

I like Miles Teller. Ever since Whiplash, I decided I'd watch him in just about anything. And he's good here as an action/romance guy who woos Taylor-Joy from a distance. I was surprised at how much of the movie's runtime was dedicated to their relationship, even though it was a little ridiculous (flirting by shooting high-powered rifles at each other's living quarters?!). But after a while, I wondered when we would ever discover what's in the gorge.

The Bad

I wish I turned off the film once we discover what's in the gorge. It's almost like the writers went "Whoa whoa whoa...we've built up all this mystery about a hole in the ground, but we've spent all our time on a romance subplot! Quick, throw them in the gorge and have them shoot stuff and let's wrap this up!" From that point, everything was rushed and lame: bad CGI, not-scary adversaries, and a plot that nobody (even the leads) seemed to care about.

The Ugly

There's actually a second point I should've turned the movie off, and it's when Teller's character pauses to think for a second and says something like, "These things can think tactically." Shortly after there's a scene with a jeep that involves driving completely vertical up a mountain." It's like one of those shooting games in the arcade where you press a pedal to pop up from behind cover, only to find swarms of baddies coming from all corners of the screen. Only playing those arcade games is way more engaging.

The Bottom Line

If you were to take the pre-gorge story and fully develop it as a romance drama, I think it could've worked! But as an action/adventure, it's a "hole" lot of disappointment. See what I did there?

Score

1/5 stars